Update and Comments: 3 February 2020

Never Just Another Day !

Every day is a clean slate in many ways, and you just never know what you are likely to experience. Sometimes you tend to feel battered and bruised, especially when you are let down by friends and family who somehow just don’t do what you would have expected them to do. The only way to cope with these disappointments is to always try to remember that, no matter how much we think we know another person, everyone has their own unique agenda, and way of going about life.  It is somewhat egocentric to think that somebody else is actually capable of even knowing how you feel and what you expect from them. The upside is that life is rarely dull and boring when you are in contact with other members of the human race. That having been said, even one’s four- legged family members are often a complete enigma and can be full of surprises – not always what you would have anticipated or even considered when they came into your life.  That is another story entirely.

If you are, like me, a person who has always been labelled as talkative (at least one junior school report stated, “Judith would do better to listen more, and talk less!”) then it can really be a big advantage once you leave the restrictive school environment. When it comes to getting to know other people then it really is far easier if one tends to be more of an extrovert than an introvert. The years should have taught us to use our ears twice as much as our mouths, and then the interaction with new acquaintances is likely to yield some amazing facts. Nothing is more rewarding than finding that you connect really comfortably with someone you just happened to meet along life’s way, purely by starting a conversation.

There is always likely to be something which any two people have in common, be it age, culture, career, one’s children, pets or even just being in the same place at the same time. So often you stand in a queue waiting to be served and the person in front of you may seem quite unfriendly, judging by their demeanour. However, just a word about the weather or a comment regarding the products you have purchased, may result in a total change of mood and you find you have a very pleasant interaction until it is your turn to be served. Poking fun at yourself is also an ice breaker and it is good if we are able to take ourselves less seriously than we may have done when we were younger.

The reason for this piece of writing is due to my having had a really great experience last week. Walking through a local shopping centre, I happened to find myself passing a woman who was working on her laptop whilst having a cup of coffee. I couldn’t resist just making a comment regarding never being able to get away from one’s work. She responded immediately and it was very refreshing to discover that we had quite a similar outlook on life despite a difference in age as well as culture.  When I left I just felt that I needed to give her my business card, purely so she would have my mobile number as well as my e-mail address. A few days later I was absolutely thrilled to receive a short message from her saying how much she had enjoyed our conversation. I will definitely be keeping in touch with her as, seeing what it is that she does for a living, opens up many areas of common interest which would make for great future conversations.

So, my words of wisdom, for what they are worth, are that the best way to handle each day with all its potential challenges and stresses is to go out there and face the world and expect the unexpected! With a bit of luck, whatever the day may bring, as long as you have the right state of mind, you will experience more positives than negatives which should leave you feeling satisfied when evening comes and you finally drift off into the Land of Nod.

“To expect the unexpected shows a thoroughly modern intellect
– Oscar Wilde

Bye for now and see you on the Magic Roundabout!

Updates and Comments2 472x265

Accepting the Inevitable…..or Not???

Cosmetic Surgery 515x515

I read an article once, written by a celebrity who said that, whilst walking down a high street, she glanced at her reflection in the shop window and was shocked to see her mother! The reality hit home that she had aged and now had to face the fact that youth had passed her by! The way in which we choose to handle this inevitable fact of life is  often dictated by one’s financial status.

This article is not meant to be sexist in any way, as it can apply to male readers as well as female.  So, all you men out there, whether hetero, homo, or for that matter, bi or trans, one hopes you too will find it informative.

Most people know of someone who has decided to fight the ageing process by undergoing some form of cosmetic surgery. Many of these people never discuss what they have had done to improve their looks, but often the results speak for themselves – and not always in a positive way either! The cost of cosmetic surgery, or enhancement techniques, can often be extremely prohibitive and for the average person it’s often just a pipe dream. However, if one feels that there is a way to get help to lift the droopy breasts, firm the butt, remove sagging eye lids etc. it is critical that research is done regarding the professional one is going to trust to do the job.

Any kind of surgery carries a certain amount of risk but, by choosing a qualified practitioner who comes recommended by satisfied, bona fide patients, one is reducing the risk of disappointment as well as disfiguration. It has become apparent that, due to the high cost of many procedures, people search the internet for cheaper options. In order to save money, many people have opted to have treatments done in countries other than their own, and the results in some instances have been less than perfect.  Standards of hygiene and the skills of those performing the techniques in foreign countries can be questionable.

It is a known fact that many foreigners come here to South Africa for cosmetic surgery, which, when one is paying in dollars or pounds, is much more affordable than in their own country. Plus, the standards for such procedures is known to be high. If you are thinking of having a procedure done purely for cosmetic reasons, then the advice is to check the credentials of the person in whose hands you are putting your trust. It is probably acceptable to ask for contact details of past, satisfied, patients, and also to see the qualifications of the professional you wish to have operate on you. Just having a sexy hunk of a man willing to improve your breasts, or lift that sagging bum may sway you into trusting him. Don’t let yourself be coerced by sales talk either. You are the person footing the bill. You need to know all the risks involved in the relevant procedure, and what the potential outcome will be for you. Like most things in life today – you get what you pay for.  Cheaper often becomes costlier in the long run. However, more than that, you are entitled to get as much information regarding the procedure as you can.

Information is power! Take your time, ask the questions, and if you feel that you will be happier after the surgery and you trust your practitioner – go for it and never fear that looking glass again!!

Mother

 That dear, familiar face I’ll see no more,

Nor hear the voice I loved so well.

You’ve gone from me now to that place far away

Where time will have no meaning,

And pain will be a stranger you once met.

Thank you for your love – and my life.

How can a Mother ever be repaid?

The joy you brought us all

Will stay in our hearts forever.

When the pain has eased and we laugh once more,

We’ll remember the pleasure we gained

From our times spent together.

Rest in peace Mother.


Judy Binns Nemeth –
 This poem was written several years ago for a friend whose mother had died suddenly whilst spending a holiday with him and his family.

 

Self-Esteem

Living in today’s world with all its technological advances seems to have created a situation whereby people tend to be less satisfied with themselves and their lives than their parents  or grandparents ever were. For example, social media, whilst having many benefits and allowing people to keep in touch with one another instantaneously, has a dark side as well. Spending time on viewing the lives of others can result in feelings of failure, insecurity and low self-esteem. After all, by nipping and tucking photos with the help of photoshop, even the most ordinary looking person is suddenly able to look like a movie star.  It is also a way to brag about one’s life – wonderful holidays, great social life, amazingly happy families. The list goes on and on.

There are many reasons for having  poor self-esteem or poor self-image and one could write reams on the subject and many people have already done so. My hope is to discuss some of the factors which can have either a negative or positive influence on the way in which people perceive themselves. There will be several articles linked in some way to the first one which concentrates on self-esteem.