Jude – Page 3 – The Magic Roundabout

Pomp and ceremony. 2021 May No. 1

Although I have lived on the other side of the world from my birthplace for most of my life, I still feel a strong bond to my English roots. As much as I try to have a fairly casual attitude to anything Royal, the pomp and ceremony which is part and parcel of the British culture never ceases to make me feel proud of my heritage. The recent funeral of Prince Philip just emphasised once more how much there is to admire whenever there is any occasion involving the Royal Family.

So much negativity and gossip seem to be part and parcel of the world today and when it involves “the Firm”, to coin a new phrase to describe the Royal Family, then much of the fanfare is to sell the news to the world at large. We had just recovered from the Megan Markle and Oprah Winfrey debacle, when we heard that the Duke of Edinburgh had died just a few weeks away from what would have been his 100^th birthday. Despite anything negative having been aired on television recently showing flaws in the early years of the royal marriage, the fact is that the Duke had been a very important support for her Majesty the Queen throughout a marriage spanning 73 years. That in itself is an amazing achievement.

When one watches a British royal event one can only admire the precision with which everything occurs. Discipline and control as well as taking absolute pride in being part of the proceedings is par for the course. Everything goes according to plan and the timing is precise. No such thing as delays and hiccups – a far cry from African time! There was not very long for the entire proceedings to be planned and even the tailors must have worked around the clock making the identical outfits for the males in the entourage. Once again, the perfection of the outfits, both male and female had to be admired for their beautiful quality and fit.

I felt sad when I watched Her Majesty enter the chapel on her own, as well as sitting by herself whilst the funeral service took place. She looked rather frail and alone – not surprising when one considers that she is 95 years of age. It was a very tasteful ceremony and apparently the kind of service which would have been chosen by the Duke of Edinburgh. When the British do something such as hosting a royal occasion, then the hundreds of years of pageantry and tradition guarantee an event of which they can be proud.

Communication in 2021

I hesitate to appear to come across as a professional moaner, but there are certain things which rile me more than others. One of those is the inability of far too many people to communicate effectively, or correctly. Everyone is quick to blame technology and the constant use of mobile phones and i-pads as being the cause, but I tend to disagree. I believe that part of the problem is the current obsession with oneself, one’s rights and one’s feelings of self-importance, with little regard for other people. A saying which has left a lingering impression on me is, “You will be remembered not so much for what you did, but how you made people feel.” Very profound words if you take the time to consider just what they mean.

Many of us across all age groups are faced with too much to do in the course of the day, and not enough hours to get it all done. Therefore, making the effort to get in touch with friends, family or even acquaintances, just to find out how they are coping in these troubling times, should be seen as a privilege by the recipient of the contact. In many cases this is not so. Nothing is more uplifting than someone sounding genuinely pleased at hearing your voice on the other end of the line, or having enjoyed reading your written message, either via WhatsApp or e-mail.

It is very deflating to find that, no matter how you try, certain people just seem to be either too involved in their day-to-day activities, or just not interested in hearing from you to respond. It takes a very thick skin not to feel disappointed and often dejected. Surely, it’s only common courtesy to acknowledge that someone has bothered to think of you and to try to get in touch? In days gone by, when it was very much more challenging to be able to keep in touch with one another, people did recognize the importance of having good manners. That does not seem to be the case in the world in which we now find ourselves. Hence, it can be a pleasant surprise when you get a truly happy response from the other person. It is enough to give you a certain amount of motivation to carry on making contact with people even if your response rate is not as high as you would have liked.

Another gripe (excuse the moan) is when, through your communication channel, you have enquired about certain aspects of the other person’s life or situation, or even something connected to a shared past incident or occasion, and their response totally omits any reference to the subject you mentioned. It seems that they did not even take the time to actually read what you had written. This kind of communication can be very frustrating and leave you feeling irritated and dissatisfied with the outcome of your endeavours. Nothing makes life more meaningful and pleasant for many of us than being able to communicate with other people, and it is sad that it seems to be the older generation who still bother to make the effort. Not all older people are sitting around waiting to die and having hours of time on their hands. These days many find that they are busier than ever before, and retirement is not on their agenda. However, they are often still the ones who make the effort for meaningful communication.

Another adage which can refer to the above is, “If you want something done, give it to a busy person”. Where computer games, mobile phone usage and hobbies take up a large portion of a person’s day, apart from studies or work, then it is probably somewhat unrealistic to expect any time to be given up for reading your correspondence, or to call you back after you left a voice message. Strange as it may seem, it is very often the busiest members of your so-called “circle of influence” who give you the satisfaction and pleasure of the kind of response for which you were hoping.

My wish is that, despite the world moving at a breakneck pace where technology is concerned, we begin to see more people keeping in touch meaningfully with one another. Should this not happen, then feelings of abandonment, loneliness and worthlessness are likely to manifest themselves in more and more cases of depression and even self-harm, which could be avoided or minimised just by communicating how much you care for the other person’s well-being.

“The single biggest problem in communication is the illusion
that it has taken place.” – George Bernard Shaw

Update and Comments – 18 April, 2021

Hopefully, some of you noticed that I have added an extra section to my blog called “Coffee and a Chat”. The reason for my starting this is that, on so many occasions, I feel that there is something which, although not earth shattering, happens to appeal to my senses in one way or another. It is often watching a bird or even a small lizard getting on with its day-to-day activities, that gives me a feeling of pleasure, and a reason to be alive in this crazy, confusing world in which we find ourselves currently. Things such as those I have mentioned above may take me just a few sentences to describe or, who knows, something simple may justify a couple of paragraphs. One way or the other, I will be attempting to post on a fairly regular basis, and hence will attempt to prevent writer’s block from paralyzing both my mind as well as my hands!

On a slightly different note, it was such an emotional afternoon watching her Majesty, Queen Elizabeth, sitting in the chapel at Windsor Castle, observing her husband’s funeral service. As she arrived at the entrance, she seemed so small and fragile, and one just felt the need for someone to hold her arm and escort her safely to her pew. After all, at 94 years of age, albeit fit and healthy enough to still ride her horses, a stumble could so easily have occurred. Fortunately, nothing untoward did happen. Many of us watching the ceremony must have felt a great sadness just seeing her enduring the service so very alone with her grief. She has lost not only her long-time beloved husband but a support system which cannot be replaced. Extremely sad indeed.

Well, that’s my bit for today, and I do appreciate knowing that there are a number of readers out there who do seem to enjoy at least some of the writings which are on my blog.

Bye for now and see you on the Magic Roundabout!

The one who rules the roost. – April No. 2

“Don’t you realise that it’s afternoon playtime? Why do I have to do my utmost to look as pathetic and badly treated as possible, just to get you to do what I want you to do?”

“Please leave me alone to get on with writing this article, as I have a deadline. Just go outside and lie in the sun, or play with your toys, but I don’t have time right now to play with you.”

“Oh, come on, what does writing an article have to do with giving me the treatment I so richly deserve?”

“I told you that I have to earn a living and writing this article is one of the ways in which I make enough money to feed and house you.”

“Do I look as though I believe you?”

“Please be good and leave me alone just for another half an hour or so, and then I will have time for you.”

“You’ve got to be kidding. Patience is not my strong point at all. I would have thought that, after living together for the past 2 years, you would understand my needs completely.”

“I keep on telling you that you are not the only factor in my busy life. Now please leave me alone for a short while so that I can finish my work.”

“I am going nowhere without you. You can try as hard as you want. You can even resort to threats of putting me up for adoption, but I know you would never do anything like that. So, sorry for you, but I am going to make as much of an irritating noise as I possibly can so that you will have to come and play with me.”

“Please, just for the next few minutes, sit down and be quiet. If you behave, then I will come and play with you. Do you understand what I am asking of you?”

“I actually don’t negotiate on your terms and I will continue to irritate you until I get my way.”

“You can be such a spoilt brat and I am tired of always having to do just what you want, and never what I feel like doing.”

“You were told that I was special so that should have warned you. I am special and you need to treat me with the respect that I deserve. I am intelligent as well as good looking, so please understand that I am not average at all.”

“Look, you are really getting on my nerves. You have been given so many toys and heaps of attention recently and you just don’t seem to appreciate anything. It’s almost as though you think that you deserve to be treated like a valuable, rare commodity. I don’t know where you got that superior attitude from, but it’s driving me nuts. Now, please just another few minutes and I will finish what I’m doing, and play with you.”

“Oh, I suppose I had better do as you ask otherwise my life could become difficult. You might just decide to go out without me again and I will be locked up for hours until you decide to come home. I will lie down here next to you and just have a quick nap and hope that you really will decide to play with me as soon as you finish what you are doing.”

Am I the only nutcase out there in the big wide world whose life has been taken over by a mutt who doesn’t need to be able to talk in order to express exactly what she wants. Isn’t it amazing that, with no verbal interaction at all, our four-legged companions are able to let us know just what they want as well as how they are feeling. Life would be very dull without our dear Kelly, but an extra few hours in every day wouldn’t go amiss either, just to be able to fit in all the important things and not just doggy playtime!

Coffee and a Chat – April No. 1

I cannot believe that I have been so shockingly neglectful about my blog over the past year. It’s all very well to blame lockdown restrictions and the Covid 19 pandemic, but I must take a great deal of the blame myself. Somehow days just fly by at an alarming rate and I just want to grab hold of time and make it slow down, just a bit. Suffice to say that I have decided to stop grumbling about lack of hours in the day and to make a concerted effort to post something short, and hopefully of interest to some of you out there, every couple of days. This should assist in the prevention of the so-called “writer’s block”.

Isn’t it amazing just how you only really start to see the true person when you observe their relationship with money. We are all very aware of how difficult life has become and it is certainly not easy to amass fortunes, unless one is a corrupt politician or an out and out scoundrel, or both! However, observing the way in which individuals react in circumstances where cash is involved can make or break a friendship, or a business deal. Sad to say, there seem to be way too many people who have made money their God. It isn’t money which is the root of all evil, but the love of money!

We can’t do very much without it, and we need to have it in order to survive as well as to help others in this lifetime, but when meanness of spirit is the result of penny pinching, it can really kill a friendship. I am sure that many of us have felt let down and disappointed when this has happened and it sometimes results in us feeling used and abused, especially if we should land up paying the bill after meeting a tight fisted “friend” for coffee or a snack at their invitation.

Thinking back over the years and remembering people who were, for a lengthy period of time, friends with whom we socialized on a regular basis, money matters often created a certain amount of discomfort. One couple lived in a fairly affluent suburb, the husband was a company director, but at every turn the wife was counting the pennies and making sure that the meals she made for us were the most economical possible, despite the fact that we made every effort to entertain them well in our home. Even her children had to put a price tag on everything that was purchased, including the cost of re-decorating their bedrooms! Strangely, when our own financial situation took a bit of a temporary dive for various reasons, we no longer heard from this family. Did they think we were going to arrive on their doorstep, suitcase in hand and expect charity? Instead of showing some concern for our well-being, we were instantly taken off their Christmas card list!

When I have been involved in direct selling it has always interested me to observe the various attitudes by customers across the board when it comes to payment. One person comes to mind who, having placed a relatively large order, wanted to know what I would give her as a gift for buying from me. The fact that I was saving her time as well as money and personally delivering her order seemed to be of no consequence. At the other end of the continuum, there are those customers who have very little cash to spare, place an order and then almost refuse to accept the few rands of change which is due to them. Just goes to show the difference between those with the generous hearts versus the tight fisted penny pinchers, who make sure that their payment is correct to the last cent! This is a painful learning curve when one first becomes aware of these differences in peoples’ relationship with money!

We all need money and it might not bring happiness, but not having any, most certainly brings sadness and despair, and with it crime. That is something we are very much aware of here in South Africa. However, enough waffling and today I am feeling positive and am looking at a totally blue sky, and a relatively warm day. A good day to be alive!

Coffee and a Chat

There are always so many moments in life which create memories, feelings and often a sense of nostalgia as well as a desire to share them with other people. That is why I have decided to create this new section within my blog. I sincerely hope that there will be writings which you find fun or thought provoking, depending upon my mood at the time. Some of these will be short and others not so short, but hopefully you will enjoy reading them as much as I enjoy writing them.

Update and Comments – January, 2021

Well, here we find ourselves facing a year in which anything is possible, and nothing is likely to surprise any of us any more! After 2020, for those of us who have managed to survive relatively unscathed, what is there ahead which can shock or disappoint us any more than the events of the past year. If anyone had told us on 1 January 2020, that we were facing a pandemic of previously unseen proportions, we would have asked them what they had been smoking or snorting! However, somehow, most of us have survived this year and if it hasn’t totally destroyed our mental well being, perhaps it has made us a little stronger than we were at the end of 2019.

It is impossible to be flippant about the past year as it has brought untold trials and tribulations for so many people. Financially, there are few of us who can honestly say that we know of no-one who has either lost their jobs or had their hours reduced to a level where mere survival is the name of the game. Some people may never ever be employed again and for others it will take years of hard slog and perseverance to creep back to some semblance of normality with the accompaniment of financial stability. When the past year has seen the loss of loved ones, no financial recompense is going to alleviate the loneliness and heartache which this has caused.

It is difficult to be positive when we are still being bombarded with statistics relating to the Covid 19 pandemic, and we are not alone. Most countries in the world are now in some or other form of lockdown yet again. The only areas which appear to be relatively “normal” right now seem to be in Asia. Where a ruling party demands respect and obedience, it seems that the population at large listen to the call to follow preventative protocols. Asian countries tend to be ruled in a disciplinarian manner whether communistic or not. The resultant low numbers of affected people are proof enough that it all boils down to doing what you are told to do by the government. Sadly, if the ruling party comprises a corrupt bunch of uneducated thieves then the public at large is hardly likely to take any instructions dished out by them as meaningful. Hence, no adherence to rules regarding the wearing of masks, maintaining social distancing, and refraining from mingling with crowds of people is resulting in the numbers of sick and dying people growing day by day.

The vaccines which are already being rolled out in many first world countries should eventually result in the pandemic being brought under control. However, in less privileged societies, who knows just how long the fear of being infected will continue. Only time will tell.

Meantime, wherever you find yourself in the world, may 2021 bring you good health, happiness and prosperity as well as safety for your family members!

“Try to be a rainbow in someone’s cloud!“
– Maya Angelou (American Author).

Bye for now and see you on the Magic Roundabout!

ESP

It had been happening for as long as she could remember, but she just thought it was something which happened to everyone, but then again – did it? She had never mentioned it to another soul, other than her mother, and most certainly not to Gary, her husband, who was way too practical to have been able to understand it at all. He would be very quick to call for help and it might even include the kind which came equipped with restraints, and men in white coats! It was a great pity that she had to keep all of this information bottled up inside. Also, very sad that they had so little in common, especially when it came to anything which he deemed to be bordering on lunacy or purely unscientific. Anyway, enough waffling, and let’s see when this gift of Jane’s was going to raise its head again.

Our heroine led a pretty mundane life which consisted of doing some part time work for a local vet and otherwise being a housewife, with one adult son, living in another part of the country, who was presently studying to be a lawyer. However, as it happened, things took an interesting turn one fateful morning in mid – December. She was shopping for Christmas gifts for her brother’s twin girls at the local mall, when she suddenly thought of her old school friend Maureen, and wondered what kind of a life she had lived. Jane hadn’t heard any news concerning her in years and she couldn’t understand why she should be thinking of her now. Despite all the distractions surrounding her in such a busy shopping centre, she just could not get thoughts of Maureen out of her mind. These thoughts were connected to their last day of high school, when everything looked exciting and no -one knew what the future might hold for them. Some of the students would go on to study further whilst others had jobs lined up or were taking a year to travel before worrying about the future. Those were the ones whose parents had enough money to support them while they made up their minds about what they wanted to do. Jane wasn’t one of those, although Maureen probably was, as her parents seemed to be well off, and she was an only child.

When they all arrived at school on that last day, Shy Simon came into the class carrying a fluffy pink teddy bear. Well, you can just imagine the giggling and hushed whispers from some of the girls as well as the snide remarks from the rugby jocks who were part of the class. Poor Simon must have felt like a total idiot, but he had enough strength of character to ignore everyone. He put the teddy on his desk and didn’t even look around. “Hi Simon. Who’s the lucky girl – or is it for a boy perhaps?” That came from the class stud, Ian, who although extremely good looking, a first team rugby player and the most popular boy with most of the girls, was an absolute egotistical pig. He was also known as being a total dumbo when it came to academics whereas Simon was Dux scholar. Before Simon could answer, Maureen arrived at class and the giggling and sniggering stopped. She was a very pretty, unassuming girl who had a beautiful personality to go with her looks. No-one had anything bad to say about her.

A few minutes later their class teacher arrived and addressed a few words to the pupils before his attention was taken by the bright pink teddy bear sitting on Simon’s desk. “Well, Simon, that is quite a bear. Who is going to be taking it home with them?”, he asked. With that Simon, who ever since grade 1 had been nicknamed Shy Simon, got up from his seat and walked over to Maureen’s desk and presented the bear to her. “I want to wish you everything of the very best for your future, Maureen. Our paths are very unlikely to ever cross again, but this bear will remind you of how much you have meant to me through all my school years. You will never know how much your kindness has helped me to cope when so many of the rest of you (at this point Simon turned to all the grinning faces which were ready to make a fool of him) couldn’t wait to try to make me feel like a loser. Thank you for your friendship Maureen and may the future bring you everything that you deserve. ” There was total silence in the classroom as Simon placed the bear on Maureen’s desk and went to sit down. No-one said a word.

The last morning at school was taken up with saying goodbyes to one another and saving the addresses and telephone numbers of the people you hoped to keep in touch with as well as signing one another’s school shirts to be kept as souvenirs. Then, in no time at all it was midday and those 12 years of school were finally over.

What has all the above to do with Jane and her extra sensory perception? Well, for as long as she could remember, Jane had been able to know when someone was going to phone her, or when she would find a letter from a friend or relative in her letterbox. It had become commonplace with her, and she just took it for granted. Her mother had also on many occasions seemed to know what was about to happen before it actually did, so Jane never questioned her own intuition, as she called it. It was obviously a gift which she had inherited. Somewhere in the past there had been an Irish relative who was reputed to have been able to foretell the future, so it must have been a gift which had been passed down through the generations.

When Jane was checking her e-mails later on that day, after a successful shopping expedition and feeling quite tired after lugging so many heavy parcels out of the boot of her car, she could hardly believe what she was seeing. After almost 30 years, there was going to be a reunion of her final high school year. No-one had bothered to do anything at all regarding keeping in touch and now, after all this time, how many of her class were still in the country, or even still alive? The reunion was scheduled for the middle of January, as the writer (past head prefect) felt that too many people would be away on holiday over the festive season. Jane replied in the affirmative and then sat staring at the screen with so many thoughts going through her mind.

After leaving school, Jane’s family had moved to another part of the country and Jane herself had started working for a small engineering company as their receptionist, but had soon been promoted. She had studied book-keeping part-time and once she completed the course, she began keeping the books for the company and then went on to marry the owner’s son, Gary, much to her parents’ delight. She had virtually lost touch with all her old school friends except for a girl called Shirley who just happened to move to the same town as Jane’s family and who also, coincidentally, joined the same gym as Jane and her husband. Shirley was gay and had moved away from home because her family were extremely narrow minded and made Shirley’s life a living hell. Over time, Jane saw quite a lot of Shirley and her partner, Kay. As Gary was not really into socialising other than with his family and a few golfing friends, the girls made a point of meeting for lunches or dinners at local restaurants or coffee shops at least once a month.

Shirley must have kept in touch with some of the other old friends from school days and given them Jane’s e-mail address, otherwise how on earth would she have been included in the invitation to the reunion? As she gave it some thought, she realised that it would be a lot of fun to go back to the old town and re-connect with some of her ex-classmates. It could be interesting to see just how their lives had panned out and how they differed from hers. Also, it could be very interesting to find out who had married whom, and which of them were on their second or even third partner! Would Maureen be there, or had she emigrated? She was probably leading a very exciting life, maybe she had even landed up in Hollywood with her looks, and the modelling classes she had always taken. She had a stunning singing voice as a teenager and took ballet classes as well as modelling. Who knew what life had been like for her? Most certainly a lot more exciting than Jane’s!

Christmas came and went in much the same way as it always did. Martin, their son, spent the festive week with his parents before joining his varsity friends for a holiday down at the coast. Jane’s brother and his family as well as their parents always tried to spend this time of the year together and it normally passed without any squabbles or unpleasantness, unlike so many families to whom Christmas and New Year always presented stress and disappointment. All the cooking and preparations were shared, and the time passed all too quickly.

Before one could blink, Gary was back at work and Jane was into her usual routine. Her three half days at the local vet had become her refuge from the humdrum pattern of housework and shopping. She had been replaced as the bookkeeper at Gary’s company once Martin had arrived. Over the years she had been quite happy to be able to spend the time when he was growing up taking him to all his extramural activities and helping out at school fetes and other fund- raising activities. However, those days were over and she enjoyed her job meeting new people and lending a sympathetic ear when there was worry regarding the health of a favourite pet. It was amazing just how much she had learned just by listening to all the conversations between the vet and the pet owners. She sometimes felt that she was so knowledgeable these days that she could diagnose some of the ailments herself!

The school reunion was approaching and Jane made the effort of buying an attractive outfit and having her hair re-styled as she wanted to look her best after all these years. Unlike many women of her age, she had kept her figure and always made sure that she wore make-up before she left home. She was really looking forward to the event and she and Shirley had agreed to drive there together and had booked into a local hotel for the night. It was too far to consider coming back home after the dinner and they were certain that the whole affair would probably carry on until fairly late. The woman who had organized everything had found a restaurant which had a large conference room which they were going to use, and music was planned once the meal was over. It all sounded great, and Jane was getting quite excited at the prospect of re-connecting with old friends. Gary was quite happy not to accompany the women to the reunion, citing urgent business as his excuse. Jane was actually rather relieved to be able to play the role of the single woman, if only for one night, as he could be a real party-pooper if the mood took him.

On the afternoon of the reunion, Shirley picked up Jane and they had enough time to take it easy on the journey back to their old hometown. It was quite strange, but on the way, Jane suddenly started feeling really sad and depressed, and she just could not stop thinking about her old school friend, Maureen. Try as she might, her mood became very morbid, and she really battled to shake it off, in order to enjoy this rare time of freedom from the humdrum routine which was her normal life. She tried chatting about all sorts of different things while Shirley did the driving but deep down she felt sad and couldn’t understand why.

The women booked into their hotel and parted company as they each went to their own rooms to relax for a while before getting themselves showered and dressed for the evening. Shirley’s partner had also decided to avoid any form of potential unpleasantness which may have cropped up by joining in on the occasion, and it seemed that Shirley too was quite happy to have some time to herself. The arrangement was that they would arrive at the venue around 7pm and dinner would be served at 8pm.

When they arrived at the restaurant it was to find that they hardly recognized some of the people whom they had last seen so long ago. It was unbelievable how many of them looked like total strangers. A large number of the men had lost most of their hair, had pot bellies and bore no resemblance to the 18 year olds with whom they had matriculated. The women seemed to have fared better, although some of them looked extremely overweight, frumpy or, in some cases, mutton dressed as lamb. Very short dresses with high heels were fine as long as the body did justice to the overall look. Once the drinks started flowing, and people started introducing themselves to one another, a festive feel came over the gathering. Jane, however, although chatting away to some of her old classmates, still could not dispel the feeling of sadness and gloom which had been bothering her most of the day.

It was interesting to find out how some of the classmates’ lives had panned out. Some of them had actually moved overseas but had made the effort to be there for the reunion, others were still living in the same town and their own children now attended the same high school as their parents and, unbelievably, some of the original teachers were still teaching there. Amazing how, although time marches on regardless, some things just stay the same. It turned out that two of the classmates had died over the past few years. One had sadly committed suicide when his business collapsed, and the other one had been killed in a light aircraft crash. Other than that, it seemed as though the passing years had been pretty kind to most of them.

It was almost time for them to take their places at the tables as dinner was about to be served. Suddenly two late comers arrived and all the chatting and laughing came to an abrupt halt. The late arrivals were assisted into the conference room by two of the hotel staff who held the door wide enough for the two wheelchairs to enter. There was a shocked silence, and no-one seemed ready to make the first move. The couple who had just arrived had hardly changed at all in appearance, but it was quite clear that their circumstances most certainly had changed, and not for the better either.

It was Maureen who broke the silence by saying in her well- remembered, clear and melodious voice, “Hello, everyone! Thank you so much for contacting Simon and I. We wouldn’t have missed this occasion for anything!”

Everyone started gathering around the two wheelchairs and the whole atmosphere very quickly returned to its previous happy and jovial mood. No-one had expected Maureen and Simon to have remained friends, but it would seem that they were far more than friends. It was time to be seated at the tables and everyone had their name on their designated spot. It was ironic, but Maureen and Simon had been placed in the centre of the long table, as it was obvious that one of the old classmates had known their circumstances. It turned out, once Maureen started explaining, over the first delicious course of the dinner, that both she and Simon had gone their own ways for over 20 years, until bumping into one another whilst on an organized coach tour of Europe. Neither of them had married, and they each had several failed relationships behind them. They had found that they really enjoyed one another’s company and it wasn’t long before they moved in together, and a year later got married.

No-one wanted to bombard them with personal questions, but it wasn’t necessary as Maureen told everyone the devastating story which had resulted in both herself and Simon being wheelchair bound. It seemed unbelievably bad luck that within a year of their marriage, Maureen had taken a tumble down a flight of stairs at a local shopping centre and had broken her back in several places and would never walk unaided again, whereas Simon had been diagnosed a few months after Maureen’s accident with multiple sclerosis which was currently progressing rather rapidly, He was finding it increasingly difficult to keep his balance, hence the wheelchairs, which they now both needed. Maureen had enjoyed many years as a relatively successful dancer and singer and had travelled quite extensively until she found that she was getting very tired of the lack of permanence in her life. Simon, on the other hand, had qualified as an accountant and had held a high position but realised that he had an insatiable desire to travel. It was ironic that he should have booked for a European coach tour at the same time that Maureen had decided to have a really chilled travelling holiday, without having to arrange hotel bookings, theatre tickets etc. How strange that life had brought them together after all these years. They seemed so very much in love, and it was a real eye opener for many of the old classmates to see these two, with all the challenges ahead of them, being so comfortable with their situation, and so obviously happy.

Jane realised that those thoughts of Maureen which had popped into her head several weeks ago must have been her esp. along with the feelings of melancholy which had crept in today. Any sadness had now been dispelled as it was clear that Maureen and Simon had something very special, which many of the other people attending this reunion might never experience for themselves, even if they lived to be 100. Sad as their situation might appear to others, they actually had a relationship which was to be envied and not pitied. Life was full of surprises, good and bad, and having a sixth sense was something which you got used to and embraced. Altogether, the reunion just cemented the fact that life cannot be controlled and it is full of surprises, challenges, and good times which need to be savoured and stored in one’s memory, to be brought out in the years ahead to give meaning to everything. One just did not know what might lie ahead and, possibly, that was a good thing anyway.

Update and comment – 1 November 2020

It is a chilly, overcast day, here in Johannesburg, with more rain predicted for the next few days, and how welcome last night’s heavy rain has proved to be. Gardens were becoming parched and tempers frayed. Weeks of extremely hot sunshine without even a drop of rain has made many of us very tired – not easy going about one’s day to day business in that kind of weather. Not everyone has the luxury of floating around on an inflatable pool lounger, drinking cocktails during the day and dreaming about life after Covid! Most of us have to face whatever it is that the day brings and try as hard as we can to be optimistic about the future and continue to try to make a living.

Being able to keep in touch with friends and family members during this challenging year has proved to be a very necessary lifeline. It is so easy to wallow in self pity and become bogged down with worries and concerns, many of which are fuelled by listening to news reports or reading articles loaded with doom and gloom and resonating from the mouths of dodgy politicians or so-called experts in every conceivable area of life. So, a phone call to a friend, a joke shared on WhatsApp, or just a quick catch-up with a relative can give you enough mental energy to carry on regardless.

I was advised several years ago by a well- meaning sister-in-law to buy one of those highly recommended colouring-in books in order to forget my worries and relax. Well, after all this time I decided to get out the crayons and chill! It just isn’t for me at all! I know that I am an A-type personality and, yes, I do have some vestige of creativity within me, but colouring in? Not a chance! I was so irritable whilst trying to get good quality crayons to actually give me a dark enough hue (maybe they have just been lying in the box for so many years that their pigment has died a death!) to actually show up on the abstract design I was attempting to enhance that I got more and more agitated, and less and less relaxed. So, after about 15 minutes, I gave it up (probably for every) and have decided that painting a wall, or doing some necessary home touch-ups is definitely more my style than trying to find inner peace with a crayon in my hand! What do they say about different strokes for different folks?

Whilst writing this little epistle, the sun has come out and I might just endeavour to go into the garage and get out the green paint which is used for the garden walls and put my creativity to a practical use! Here goes, and I hope that the rain holds out just long enough to allow the pva to dry!

Bye for now and see you on the Magic Roundabout!

Update and comment – 30 July 2020

Many of us in the Southern Hemisphere are probably finding it pretty difficult right now to be full of the joys of Spring (well, it is in fact a very chilly winter’s day today, which doesn’t help matters), when all around we are being reminded of the Covid 19 pandemic. Even if we try very hard to concentrate on the positives in our lives, looking over our shoulder is that nasty little creature called reality reminding us that things are not the same as they used to be.

If one has children, and maybe even grandchildren, trying to put one’s worries and concerns about their health on the back burner, is an impossible task. If only we could put a blanket of safety over them all and keep them away from any risk of being infected, until the all clear is given by the powers that be. A pipe dream, but what an amazing thing it would be if that dream could become our new reality.

Then, in the midst of all this mayhem, something always seems to arrive to rock the proverbial boat. Why does the toilet decide to spring a leak, and a cupboard door collapse on its hinge? Is this a wake-up call from the universe to remind us that life still happens, despite the risk of attack by a vicious virus? Coping with these everyday household calamities just seems to be so much harder than in the days when our vocabulary was not dominated by words such as “cough”, “fever”, “mask”, “sanitizer” etc.

One of the worst occurrences though, at this challenging time was hearing that a family member had to face surgery with an overnight stay in hospital – when the pandemic is becoming worse by the day. No visitors are allowed, so that exacerbated the fear and stress concerning the operation. It has always been the norm for one to come around from any anaesthetic and find a partner or other relative at your bedside waiting for you to wake up. Thankfully, despite the surgery taking almost 3 hours, all went well and is now a thing of the past.

All that one can do is to try to be positive in these trying times and offer to be there to help in any way that is required when people have a need. Now, more than ever, human contact and emotional support (even if remote) is more important than it has ever been. In South Africa, the government has failed miserably to assist people who are desperate, not only to work and earn a living, but to be able to put food on the table for their family. Sadly, the bulk of those citizens who are desperate for food would still vote for the ANC despite the corruption, the lies and the lack of commitment to taking care of the poor.

So, the toilet will have to be fixed, as well as the cupboard door, and undertaking these mundane, irritating diy tasks will temporarily eliminate any thoughts of viruses and sanitizers. Without the necessary concentration and a steady hand, we will be faced with the expense of having to call in a professional handyman. Not an option at this time, so let’s get cracking and get the jobs done!

Bye for now and see you on the Magic Roundabout!